Quetch, of a Sort

“We see Doctor Mullen a lot,” said the bouncy-head. “We love Doctor Mullen. Doctor Mullen likes our in-nurds. He said so. He gave us a shot, but not with a needle.”

“In-nurds?” asked the chop-queen, holding her head under water, “Do you really mean that he likes your in-nurds, or does he just like everybody's in-nurds, or is he referring to your in-nurds but perhaps just saying that he likes your in-nurds? You have to be careful, and you have to be accurate.”

When the bubbles stopped coming to the surface of the tank which held the water under which the chop-queen held her head, she stopped speaking and pulled her head out with a great splash. She looked around the room, frantically searching for a towel. The bouncy-head handed one to her, and she dried off.

“Doctor Mullen really does like our in-nurds. He said he wanted to run his fingers through our in-nurds, and I think he really meant it. Just last week he told Suzy Potcher that he would like to pull out all of her in-nurds and drape them around his room. I figure a person really has to be fond of someone to want to do that.” The bouncy-head bobbled her head back and forth and from side to side, rolling a piece of chewing gum around in her mouth. Doctor Mullen has some pictures of in-nurds on his wall, and he said he would even take pictures of all of our in-nurds and maybe even frame some nice 8x10 glossies of them for us.”

The chop-queen opened her own abdomen by means of a long, silver spoon. This was,of course, no ordinary spoon – it was a spoon that had been sharpened to a razor-like edge, and that allowed the chop-queen to open her abdomen quietly, quickly, effciently, and with little commotion. Her in-nurds spilled out into the water tank.

“Doctor Mullen once told me that he liked my in-nurds,too,” said the chop-queen, staring blankly into the water as her in-nurds floated about gaily, “but I learned that he said that about everybody's in-nurds.”

The bouncy head looked in horror and sadness at the tank of water and the bloody mess that bobbed about on its surface.

“Well, have I told you about Doctor Sodder?” she asked the pale and wobbly chop-queen, “We see Doctor Sodder a lot. We love Doctor Sodder. Doctor Sodder really likes my ten-dins.”